Life Coaching Tip: Most of us have been waiting for life to calm down so that balance can finally show up, but that’s not how balance works. The truth is, balance isn’t a circumstance that happens to you, it’s something you actively create. And here’s the part that might just change everything: balance is actually your natural state. In this article, we explore the difference between the two kinds of imbalance, and how knowing which one you’re in can shift everything.
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When was the last time you felt truly balanced?
If you’re like most women, your answer is probably: never.
Or maybe: once, briefly, on a Tuesday in 2019. And then life happened.
Here’s what I want you to know: You’re not failing at balance.
I think you’ve been given the wrong definition.
Most of us grew up believing that balance was a circumstance. We were taught it was something that would finally arrive once life settled down . . . once the kids were older, the business was stable, the to-do list was shorter, or the mortgage was paid off.
We’ve been waiting for life to calm down so that balance could show up.
But here’s what I’ve learned that’s changed everything for me:
Balance doesn’t happen to you. You create it.
Balance is feeling alive and engaged in every area of life.
It’s not a circumstance. It’s a result that’s shaped by the way you think, feel, and act. Which means no amount of waiting will get you there.
But it also means something far more exciting: it’s available to you right now, even in the middle of the beautiful, messy, full life you’re already living.
And here’s something else that might surprise you:
Balance is a natural state of being.
There’s a concept in biology called homeostasis—the process by which your body maintains a stable internal environment, even when everything outside is changing.
Your body does this automatically. Your temperature, heart rate, and blood sugar are constantly adjusting, recalibrating, returning to center.
Balance, it turns out, is your natural state. We’re wired for it.
So, when we walk around believing that balance is impossible, a fantasy for others, but not us — we’re working against our own nature. And that’s exhausting.
No wonder it can feel so hard.
Now, this doesn’t mean that imbalance won’t ever happen. Life will always hand us seasons of more. More demands, more growth, and more change.
The goal isn’t to eliminate imbalance. It’s to become someone who can move through it without losing herself.
It’s understandable to think that burnout comes from having too much on your plate.
But it’s not the imbalance itself that creates burnout.
It’s not knowing how to navigate it.
Once I understood that, I started looking at imbalance differently. Because not all imbalance is created equal.
There are two kinds of imbalance, and only one of them is a problem.
I call the first kind intentional imbalance. This is the beautiful, productive chaos of building something. Learning something new. Investing in your future. Launching the business, writing the book, showing up fully for a season that matters.
You’re stretched, but it’s on purpose. You chose it. And underneath the busyness, there’s a hum of aliveness that tells you this is going somewhere.
Maybe it looks like choosing to work later than usual for a few weeks to bring something meaningful to life—knowing it’s temporary, not your forever.
The second kind is what I call default imbalance. This one doesn’t come from expansion. Instead, it’s depleting.
It looks like:
- Overworking without intention.
- Perfectionism that paralyzes.
- Procrastination.
- Doom scrolling at midnight.
- No boundaries between work and the rest of your life.
- Skipping sleep, skipping joy, skipping yourself.
- Ending the day exhausted, wondering where your time went, with nothing that truly moved your life forward.
This kind drains you. And it keeps you stuck.
So, the question isn’t “Am I imbalanced?”
The question is: “What kind of imbalance is this, and am I choosing it?”
Before you close this email, pause and consider this for a moment:
“Is the imbalance I’m feeling right now the kind I’m choosing on purpose, or is it the kind that’s quietly stealing my joy and energy from me?”
There’s no wrong answer, just an honest one. And it’s the kind of insight that can change everything.
The first step toward creating a shift is believing it’s possible. And I want you to start believing it, because it is.
Next week, I’m going to take this further and introduce a question that just might change the way you’ve been thinking about your life and your goals entirely.
I can’t wait to share it with you.
xo Tracy
You Have Resurrection Power