Life Coaching Tip: Many people come to coaching hoping to create tangible changes—launching a business, changing careers, or making a major lifestyle shift. Those outcomes absolutely happen, and they’re exciting to witness. But the deeper transformation often occurs beneath the surface, in the form of increased confidence, resilience, and self-worth. These powerful shifts change how you navigate life long after the original goal has been achieved. Recently, I had a personal experience that reminded me just how profound that transformation can be.
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There are both tangible and intangible benefits to life and mindset coaching. The former often gets the most kudos and attention, yet it’s the latter that often creates the massive transformation that expands over the course of a lifetime—providing limitless possibilities and mind-blowing impact. I see this unfold with my clients every single day.
Tangible results are the reasons you might seek coaching . . . the change you want to create: leaving your job to launch a business, growing your business, changing professions, or making a significant lifestyle shift. And for sure, my clients accomplish these results.
But what often catches them by surprise are the intangible results. This is the growth that changes EVERYTHING moving forward. I’m talking about increases in confidence, resilience, tenacity, and feelings of self-worth. It’s the fresh perspective of “enoughness” and sufficiency that allows them to continue to think and dream expansively—and reach higher and wider—with less fear and trepidation.
As I’ve been recovering from a fall on the ice that rocked my world for a bit, this is what I’ve been thinking about, because it’s shined a spotlight for me on my own growth and transformation that’s quietly taken place over the years. I can proudly say that I am a living product of my coaching process.
Turns out, this shit works, bahahaha!
I’m sharing this with you today, not to talk about my fall, but to offer some tips and insights. We’re all in this together, my friend.
It will be four weeks tomorrow since I fell and hurt both my arms—my left elbow was broken and required immediate surgery, and my right arm and shoulder were also impacted. For the first week or so, both of my arms were extremely painful and weak. I couldn’t use either to hold my phone, a glass of water, or even to scooch a pillow. Thank goodness for my incredible husband, Jerry, and assistant, Liz, who helped me with literally everything.
And I’m not gonna lie, this both frustrated and scared me. At one point, Jerry caught me pacing the house with a blank look on my face. He startled me when he asked what I was doing, and I realized I was just looking for something I could do—but sadly, couldn’t find anything that evening.
But here’s where I saw the growth, like monumental growth, for me. Sure, I felt all the feels (and allowed myself to do so), but I quickly became grounded in certainty (that I am capable and would be okay) and sufficiency (that I had all I needed to thrive).
When Liz (a true saint!) came over the first day to help out, I was feeling whiny and grumpy. But here’s the growth part: I recognized that my thoughts and feelings were optional. I literally said to her, “I’m sorry in advance, but I am telling myself some whopper stories today. Just know that I recognize that they are unhelpful stories and definitely not truth.”
Just saying that out loud made us both giggle, and I swiftly took my mind to sufficiency.
Honestly, this is what blew me away the most, how easily I was able to take myself to this calm, grounded sufficiency. I took inventory and recognized that although there were lots of things I couldn’t do for myself, through the kindness of others and my own resources, all of my needs were being met.
This allowed me to take almost a week off from work, rest, and watch some really good shows on Netflix without worrying or feeling the need to hustle through my recovery.
And I took stock of my wins—all of them. This is something that I insist my clients do, and for good reason. Energy flows where attention goes, sister!
Eventually, I was able to move a light pillow, brush my teeth, and pet my dog, Ginger. Then I could take notes by hand during client sessions, straighten my bangs (with Jerry holding the section up, lol), and hold a glass of water. Soon, I was dressing myself (not to brag, but including putting on my own bra), cutting the food on my plate, and guiding Ginger through one of her tricks that involves moving my arm in a way that I hadn’t previously been able to master.
Last weekend brought more independence, including driving and walking Ginger with a leash that ties around my waist. At 3 weeks post-surgery, other than having lifting restrictions, my autonomy was back.
And when I went to my Occupational Therapy appointment last Friday, I was able to bend my left elbow within normal range! This genuinely seemed to surprise my therapist, and he said we will be able to get to strength training much sooner than expected.
I know that part of this is because I’ve been doing my exercises diligently, but also because of my mindset.
And there was a hidden benefit to my injuries. Because I hurt both arms, each had to consistently work much harder in order to come back quickly. Where I might have rested my injured arm if I had one that was not impacted, that was not possible. And I’m doing the OT with both arms—allowing each to equally pull its own weight. Ta-da!
As I said, I’m sharing this not-so-riveting story with you not to bore you with the details of my recovery, but to share these practices that will make a difference, no matter the challenges you are facing. Because the same mindset shifts that carried me through this season are available to you in every moment of your life:
- Feel your feels, and do so kindly, without self-judgment. Life is sometimes hard.
- Lose the “should” or “shouldn’ts”—life is 50/50, filled with great and not-so-great circumstances. This is the human experience. Telling yourself that something “shouldn’t” have happened makes you feel like a victim and takes away your power. Accept what is and remember, the fabulous—the other part of the 50/50—is on its way!
- Ground yourself in sufficiency. How are you enough? How do you have enough? How are you already being enough?
- Look for the silver lining. Like, who would’ve ever thought that 2 injured arms would be better than one?
- Remind yourself of your badassery. You are strong, capable, and resilient. There’s absolutely nothing you can’t be, do, or have.
- Celebrate your wins. All of them. Every single teensy one. (And if your primal brain wants to instead count your losses, demand that it stop.) This is critical to build momentum from the loving place of grace, sufficiency, and worthiness—and you deserve this.
- Recognize and challenge the lies and exaggerations your primal brain is offering you. Your brain will overestimate and inflate the amount of time and effort it will take to create transformation. (Like, my brain was telling me that it could be months or years until I would fully regain my independence.) It wants you to throw in the towel. Don’t fall for it!
- Stay in your power. When the world wants to scare you, limit your options, and tell you that what you want is not possible—shut that shit down. You get to write your own story. Your version is the only one that counts. It’s your thoughts that create your reality . . . and that is simply a fact.
Please pause and take a moment today to let these reflections sink in. What already rings true for you? Where do you need to focus your energy?
I’d love to learn more about the shifts you’ve already experienced or the challenge you’re navigating right now, so please send me a message and fill me in. Tell me one win you’ve had lately, or one area where you’re working to stay in your power. I read every email.
My favorite part about the work I do is knowing that transformation is available to everyone. A wholehearted life is filled with growth and transformation. And it is in this expansion that we feel the most alive.
xo Tracy
(possibly a superhero because I can now put my own bra on)
Why You’re Seeing What You Believe