Life Coaching Tip: Perfectionism comes from a place of trying to prove enoughness — and it results in a relentless self-destructive pattern of defeat because the goal of perfection is not possible. The productivity, hustling, and grinding just gets more intense and the “not enough” story or belief gets stronger the more it’s reinforced. This article provides some tried and true ways to help you break this cycle.
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Today’s message is about another common struggle many women face—perfectionism, which often stems from feelings of not being enough.
If last week’s message resonated with you, this one likely will, too.
In her book, The Gifts of Imperfection, Brene Brown captures perfectionism brilliantly:
“Perfectionism is a self-destructive and addictive belief system that fuels this primary thought: If I look perfect and do everything perfectly, I can avoid or minimize the painful feelings of blame, judgement, and shame.”
Brown further distinguishes healthy striving from perfectionism. Healthy striving asks, “How can I improve?” while perfectionism worries, “What will they think?”
At its core, perfectionism is a way of trying to prove our “enoughness.” But it becomes a self-defeating cycle—because perfection isn’t actually possible.
The more we hustle and grind to meet impossible standards, the more we reinforce the belief that we’re not enough.
And that’s no way to live, my friend!
Perfectionism often leads to procrastination—especially when you care deeply about something and fear not being able to do it “perfectly.”
But sister! You’re not here to live in an exhausting state of doing, proving, and pleasing everyone but yourself.
You deserve a life of inspiration, not obligation.
You are here to create, grow, and stretch far beyond your comfort zone.
To do that freely, you must be willing to kick perfectionism to the curb.
Here are some tried and true ways to begin:
* CHUNK DOWN YOUR GOALS INTO SMALL, MANAGEABLE STEPS:
Break big projects down into simple steps and begin with the easiest ones. Starting small will keep overwhelm in check and help ignite your momentum.
The smaller the steps, the more success you’ll experience—and the more inspired and empowered you’ll feel.
*CELEBRATE YOUR WINS
As I said last week. celebrate your successes—all of them! This helps directs your brain to recognize your true badassery.
And remember to honor your efforts, too, not just the final outcomes. It takes guts to step into a new version of yourself—and you deserve a massive, celebratory high-five for your mightiness, every damn time!
This is how self-confidence is cultivated.
*SEE MISTAKES & FAILURES AS LEARING OPPORTUNITIES:
Mistakes and failures are a part of doing something new. If you want to be a person who stretches herself and grows, then you must accept that mistakes and failures are going to be part of the process.
But, what’s the alternative? Stagnation? That’s no way to spend your one-and-only life—and it’s certainly not who you are.
Allow yourself to see mistakes and failures as learning opportunities. Upgrading your mindset to accept this belief will help you release shame and be more forgiving and understanding with yourself. Lowering the pressure can make your journey lighter, more relaxed, playful, and fun!
And who doesn’t want more fun in their life?
*LIMIT YOUR TIME ON TASKS!
If you give yourself all the time in the world, you will take all the time in the world—and drive yourself bananas! Limiting yourself to a set amount of time to complete a task can help prevent you from overstressing, overworking, overediting, overdoing (and doing and doing!)
Practice letting “good enough” be good enough. I understand this might sound terrifying to your brain, but giving yourself a hard stop and sticking to it can be ever-so-liberating!
If you’ve been stuck in the perfectionism trap, I encourage you to give these practices a try.
You really can’t get it wrong—because showing up with intention is already a win.
You are here for expansion.
Freedom is on the other side.
xo Tracy
PS – Ready to let go of perfectionism, procrastination, and people pleasing—and finally create space for what lights you up? As your life coach, I’ll help you shift faster and more powerfully, so you can experience real transformation with more ease and clarity. To get started, simply schedule your free consultation today!:
Creating Sufficiency